I have been married for 10 years now. Sometimes I wake up and think wow we are still together. lol.. Through all the obstacles and outside influences we have managed to maintain our love for one another. Inside your 4 wall is heaven on earth, however when you add the outside elements to a relationship, things can change. Things can change by simply walking to the mailbox. Things can change by receiving the wrong phone call.
My husband and I have made a pact not to let anything or anyone in the middle of us. I have had to cut off some folks and everything. Marrying the reality does not mean “settle for less” but it means to take the pressure off and give your spouse time to grow without judgment. Most of the time they know when they are wrong.. most of the time lol. I love how my husband has evolved into a very patience husband. Married to the reality means that the “Hollywood” version of marriage is not your point of reference but learning from our grandparents generation of true love and commitment. Which to them meant to death do us part.
Marrying the reality does not mean “settle for less” but it means to take the pressure off and give your spouse time to grow without judgment.
Have I been in situations to leave my husband? Absolutely I have, but I have hand selected folks in my life I seek advice and guidance from. I remember calling one of them saying ” I’m leaving Marty today” she said “ok… can you sleep on it and call me back in a few days?” I told her “sure”. 3 days later she called and I was like “girl I love that man!” lol so sometimes you have to talk to someone who has your best interest. I’m committed to the reality that I may not have what I want when I want it. And you know what? it’s ok.. it doesn’t mean he loves me less, it simply means I can’t have it right now. God is my provider not my husband. God is my source of happiness not my husband. So why put unnecessary pressure on your spouse? So I pray and ask God and in time I’ll have it. I am committed for life so therefore I am in no rush!